It's ... a ...

GIRL. ohhhh snap!

Monday morning we said good-bye to Chuck's parents (they had been up for a weekend visit, more on that fun later!) and dropped the boys off at my mom's and then headed over to the ultrasound. We were pretty mellow - Chuck had a pretty dreadful head cold and I was in the grips of a sleep-deprived/pregnant/hormonal anxiety attack, haha. This is my one and only ultrasound during my pregnancy, so even though I'd heard a solid heartbeat at all of my regular appointments, I hadn't actually seen a healthy fetus yet, and that will mess with the mind of any mom-to-be (is everything okay? is the baby developing correctly? is the size on track? did my existing children do some sort of voodoo so their wish for twin babies will be realized?)... so I was a little on edge. 

Plus I had followed the directions to drink loads of water that morning, and I think all emotions are exacerbated when you have to pee that badly :).

But the ultrasound went so well! Our technician Amy was a superstar - and I realized part of why I liked her so much was that I remembered her from Jack's ultrasound! I doubled-checked the ol' blog to make sure, and then she checked their records and found out that she had done our ultrasound with Will too! She was the perfect mixture of fun and friendly and professional and I loved her.

We got the clear gender view of our wee little girl pretty quick in the ultrasound. I was glad to get that figured out early on so we could be mentally adjusting to this huge change in our lives, all while getting to watch her squirm around. She was crazily all over the place, so that bodes well for her ability to keep up with three older brothers!! Amy kept grabbing whatever measurements she could at the moment since there was no guarantee the baby would return to that position again. She managed to get everything she needed and our wee girlie looks perfect.

Chuck and I left the ultrasound in a bit of a fog - him because of the DayQuil and inability to breathe, and me because I was pretty much terrified. I haven't made a secret out of the fact that I'm much more comfortable with boys than I am with girls. We had some time before Chuck had to head to work, so obviously my first stop was Savers for some quick retail therapy, and it worked!

I needed some reassurance that I would be able to appropriately dress a wee girl, so I picked up a couple cute things - the yellow and white shirt and the green skirt (I promise it's cuter than this 'pulled out of the dryer mid-cycle' picture suggests...) and a couple little onesies. The sparkly silver shoes were a clearance purchase from a couple of months ago that I couldn't resist - hello SPARKLY soles! I maintain that I'm not super girly, but sparkles get me every time.

In another move to psych myself up a bit, I came home and pulled out the scrapbook that my dear mom made me and checked out some of my baby pictures.

This worked too pretty well too, I don't look that scary (I probably hadn't perfected my 'LOOK' of pure evil/disdain/terror yet...) so probably our daughter won't be that scary either, at least not at the beginning! Right?

And how excited is everyone for a slew of pictures like this, except add one more older brother??

 I'll tell you what, my mom gave me a couple boxes of my old clothes and while some of them proved too ruffly/lacy/pink to adorn my child, that dress on the right WILL be her favorite when she's old enough. I loved that dress. If I could wear it now as some sort of awkward tunic-y, puffed sleeve shirt, I would.

It's been so fun to receive congratulations and well wishes from family and friends as we've shared this news. Ultimately, Chuck and I would have been equally as delighted to discover we were having another son - and probably just as scared (four boys? sounds pretty daunting to me...). Welcoming another child into a family is thrilling and fun and wonderful and also stressful and worrisome and humbling. There's no 'one size fits all' parenting approach, so another child requires that customization, regardless of gender (and that also provides loads of opportunities to second guess your parenting! Fun!) Another child means your heart stretches and grows and your love multiplies to include that child - but that also means more heartache because it turns out you can't protect that child from sadness or pain or consequences. Another child means stretched resources - time, money, attention, space, energy. 

Basically it's a wonder any of us have a second child at all, let alone a third, fourth, etc :).

My point is that we are so grateful to be able to welcome another sweet baby into our home. I know that Heavenly Father will help our family with the adjustment and help me be the mom to this little girl that I need to be - and if her hair rarely looks combed and she wears mostly greens and blues (Chuck and I put an alarming number of Jack's outgrown onesies and clothes into a drawer for this baby, assuring ourselves they were 'gender neutral' and that with a bow, she'd be fine...) and I have to call in someone else to teach her how to put on make-up when she's a teenager, so be it. She'll be loved lots and lots and lots and we'll figure out everything else as it comes :).

[OH, and she does have a name... but in the interest of not having our slightly (very?) non-traditional choice mocked mercilessly for the next four and a half months, we're keeping it pretty close to the vest right now. We'll announce it when she's born, and then if you people feel good about poking fun at a tiny baby who can't defend herself or her parents' choice in names, then that's your deal, haha.]