Sweet, sweet baby Will

Well, I've written and rewritten this post in my head quite a few times in the last few months, so I guess we'll see how it comes out now that it's being written for real! I'd like to share some news about our sweet youngest son that we received officially yesterday, although we've been aware of it for several months now. Will has autism.

In the months following Will's first birthday, Chuck and I noticed his lack of language development but dismissed any concerns by reminding ourselves that Clyde was by no means an 'early' talker. As we continued to watch Will grow and develop, we noticed his tendency to zone out and his preference to spend time by himself, and even talked briefly about autism, but dismissed it since he has always been very social - lots of eye contact and physical affection. In the meantime, Will continued to babble in his funny own language but declined to pick up any of the sign language that we attempted to teach him. Finally, this past January, Chuck and I decided to look more seriously into the possibility of autism. At this point Will was 22 months old.

There is a lot of information - and misinformation - about autism online, but we found a website that we trusted that featured side-by-side videos of normally developing children participating in various activities and similarly-aged children with autism participating in the same activities. A light went off for both of us as we recognized our son in the videos of the children with autism, in terms of both general behavior and physical mannerisms. We met with Will's pediatrician at the beginning of February to discuss our concerns. We then began a several-month period of 'limbo' as Will was placed on waiting lists to be evaluated for speech, occupational, and developmental therapy with the Infant/Toddler Program through the Department of Heath and Welfare and as we waited for his appointment with the developmental pediatric specialist to roll around. Will has now begun both speech therapy and occupational therapy with the Infant/Toddler Program, which means that each therapist comes to our home once a week to work one-on-one with him. We're so grateful for this program and work alongside the therapists to help Will progress.


In those few months before his therapy started, we watched somewhat in awe as Will took a keen interest in the alphabet and learned to say, sign, and independently identify all 26 letters. More recently, he's picked up numbers 1 - 10. Will's therapists and doctors are all pretty amazed that he can do this, especially at such a young age (I'm equally impressed but a little less surprised, since Clyde was able to identify letters shortly after his second birthday as well). He can also sign/say around 30 words, although he doesn't use the signs to communicate needs or wants, merely to identify or to 'show-off'.

So, since January we've been operating under the assumption that Will is autistic but without an official diagnosis. Yesterday was Will's long-awaited appointment with the developmental pediatric specialist, Dr. Felix. We spent an hour with Dr. Felix as he looked over the paperwork we had filled out and mailed in, observed Will, and asked us questions. He then confirmed that Will is somewhere on the Autism Spectrum. As we also anticipated, Dr. Felix was unable to offer any definitive prognosis for Will, since every child with autism is different in how they develop and function. It reminded me of what our good friend Gloria told us, "If you've met one child with autism, then you've met one child with autism." We will continue with the speech and occupation (and eventually developmental) therapy and follow-up with Dr. Felix in a few months.


This experience has been a very peaceful, strengthening time for for both Chuck and myself. We have felt Heavenly Father's love for us, and more importantly, His deep love for Will. We feel very strongly that Heavenly Father will help us be the parents that we need to be for Will; we take comfort in the oft-repeated phrase, "Whom the Lord calls, He qualifies." That isn't to say it hasn't been difficult at times. If you re-read my post from late January, it will be more obvious why I was feeling a bit dreary then! It has also been a struggle the last couple of weeks as our normally even-tempered little boy has had a few meltdowns during which he's completely inconsolable and very angry. It's pretty understandable - I can only imagine the frustration he feels being unable to communicate his needs to us - but it's still difficult to get through. It's especially at those times that I'm grateful for my husband and parenting partner; it's nice to be able to tag him in when I'm at my wit's end!

Most of all, we are so grateful for the Lord's tender mercies for our family. We feel even more sure of our decision to have two little boys so close together in age (even though it seemed a bit crazy at the time!) as we watch Clyde and Will together. Will loves to imitate, and we know that Clyde will be an excellent role model and teacher as they play and interact together. I know that Clyde will benefit and learn so much as Will's older brother. We recognize the blessing of Will's social nature; we can't get enough of his hugs and kisses and we are very aware that children with autism often fail to recognize and/or acknowledge their parents or other people. I can't imagine how hard that would be as a parent, and I am so, so thankful that it doesn't appear we will have to endure that. We are extremely grateful for our supportive extended families and close friends. We can already anticipate how vital that support will be in the coming days, months, and years and it is already greatly appreciated. Finally, we are grateful for Will and his sweet spirit in our home.


Family picture courtesy of Mandie Anderson/Captured Moments. More to come!!